TESTIMONY

Testimony: My parents married in their mid-teens and had me 4 years later. Divorced 4 years later. My mom remarried twice and was with the person whom I call my step-father the longest.

They would be the kind of people who in a poll would say they are Christian, but weren't. They got caught up somehow in http://www.tm.org/ I remember the day we went to the TM place vividly. We were taught how to chant and meditate. It was all very strange. We didn't go back but that was our "new religion".

There was also a neighborhood friend who was a buddist, or at least her parents were, they chanted, we chanted...I was intrigued.Its been another four years, so...my parents divorced.

I was sent to live with my grandma and then my bio-dad (who is an addict). About 9 months later I moved back with my mom, who had reconciled with my stepfather. Then something happened....my mom was friends with a lady down the street who was Christian, I'd say she is Jesus with skin on.

We started going to church. I wouldn't say anyone "found Jesus" we just went to church. They "found legalism". Then they went to seminary and were ministers and missionaries.But the abusive behaviour hadn't changed. Now my parents used the bible as a means to threaten us, and abuse us in the “name of God.”


Basically by the time I am 19-20 (four years later) what difference does it make if I do bad on my own, God won't forgive me....if I do bad against my will, God won't forgive me. I may as well life whatever kind of life I want.....and I did.

Sex, drugs, rock and roll, abortions.

1995 (four years later) I have a live-in relationship, he's cheating, I'm searching for answers. I flipping thru channels and find of all people Benny Hinn preaching. I stopped and listened. Gave my life to Jesus. Its been a battle.....does God forgive? Does he really love me? Can I really do enough good? How can I be good and gain Gods forgiveness?


Four years later, I marry an awesome guy, we have a child. Its been a struggle to come to know the truth. God loves me no matter what, and God love covers a multitude of sin. Even my sin. Even the sin of my parents. (who I have forgiven)I have tried to read my bible enough, be good enough, do all the right things, I have tried to focus on ONE commandment per day of the week. Its sorta crazy all I have done to try to BE saved, win Gods approval.

Its taken 10 years for me to say....I can't do it. I am saved by grace thru faith alone.

In the words of Watermark:You come as You areAnd I come as I amAnd grace covers shameYou come in Your pow'rAnd I bow downAnd grace covers shameYou come like a flood and I'm lost in this "Hallelujah!"You come as You are and I come as I amAnd grace covers all of me... All of me...